I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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