It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
