He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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