i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Randomize