he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize