Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize