sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
