I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
