And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
