Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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