i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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