After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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