if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
no you cant smoke seaweed
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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