he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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