I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
