question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
