I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
