i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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