She's JV to your varsity
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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