North Korea, Best Korea!
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
This is my gift to your gina
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Randomize
