You can't special order awesome
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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