i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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