He is such a slut. More and more my type.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize