I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
