Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
