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I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
