You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
