You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
