Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
