Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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