Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
