worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
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