There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
