If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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