That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Soap is not a condiment
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
We left an ass print on the piano.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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