problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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