WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
