that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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