So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
