Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Randomize
