That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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