she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
