walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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