If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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