She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
