shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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