I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
You're earring is so big in my mouth
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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