dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
