In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
