I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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